The Obstacles to Finding Your Life's Purpose
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As you find your purpose, you’ll run into five challenges that you must overcome. These challenges are the reason your journey isn’t a straight line from A to B. We’re going to address how to overcome them, in turn. These obstacles come in no particular order, but you’ll encounter each of them at some point.
(1) Peer Pressure
The first obstacle is peer pressure. The book of Proverbs, in the Bible, captures how to handle peer pressure effectively. In chapter 1, verse 7, there’s a portion that says, “fools despise wisdom and instruction.” Peer pressure is a sin that fools commit; these fools want to take you down a dark path away from your destiny. The Bible suggests not to walk in the way of these people because they set their trap for their life.
When I was in high school, I was the guy who did what others wanted so that they would like me. It was a constant cycle of stupid stunts to get a laugh, but none of the people around me respected me. Back then, I didn’t listen to my inner calling because I believed all of the external voices around me. It’s no coincidence that I was at the lowest point in my life, with no car, driver’s license, job, meaningful relationship, or education.
Crazier still, It was six years after high school when I received my high school diploma. Five of those years, I was playing World of Warcraft for 15 hours a day. Everyone around me told me that was the thing to do, so I did. We were all a group of fools that didn’t want wisdom or instruction, and until an intervention occurred, I may have never found my voice.
(2) Resources
The second obstacle is your resources. Daymond John has a great book called The Power of Broke, where he talks about his resources growing up. John started a clothing line called FUBU in New York. The company started in his home in the early ’90s when internet marketing wasn’t a thing. Daymond was broke, but it was the greatest thing that happened to him, one of his blessings. Without a lot of resources, we need to get resourceful, and that’s what Daymond did.
Without the resources to get himself in storefronts or on billboards in New York, he used spray paint to tag his logo in high-traffic areas. Without the resources to get himself promoted on T.V., he negotiated with music artists, getting them to wear his clothes in their videos. Before Uber and Lyft, Daymond used some of his profits to buy a van, driving people around New York, promoting his clothing line, and selling it out of the back.
As you find your purpose, you may come face to face with the feeling that you don’t have the resources. Remember that the people who break this obstacle down get resourceful.
I lived in over 20 places by the time I was 20 years old. If having money and high-level connections were the only way to start achieving success, I would have been out from the start. You don’t need more resources; you need to repurpose what you already have. By not having the world handed to us, our advantage is that we learn to grow, control, and keep our success.
Take most child actors, for example, they came into a massive amount of success, became known throughout the world, and starred in iconic movies such as Home Alone. Where are many of them now? Who knows! Acting might be their purpose, but they received much of their success before they were ready to control it. How can anyone take care of a lion before they knew how to take care of a house cat? Many times, what comes fast, goes fast.
(3) Fake Purpose
The third obstacle is the fake purpose. The world isn’t short on false teachers, services, and products. We are so interconnected, with access to so much information that it can seem overwhelming to try to decide what path to take. Anyone with a camera can turn it on and become your next “expert.” Following what fake teachers say leads us down the wrong path, costing us loads of time and money.
Warren Buffett once said, “Don’t ask the barber whether you need a haircut.” The same wisdom applies to fake teachers. These “barbers” are everywhere, and they drown out the only voice that matters, your inner voice. In a world of fake, you need to dig deep, turn off all of the suggestions everyone has for you, and listen to yourself; that tiny inner voice is your guide. Do you know the surefire way to spot a fake? If they don’t live what they’re telling you, they’re fake.
Understand, just because something is fake doesn’t always mean that there are wrong intentions. Plenty of well-meaning people unintentionally set others back with their ignorant advice. You’re out to find your purpose, so you need to be able to sift through the noise and identify what’s real.
Today my wife was scrolling through Instagram when a girl popped up in her feed to share that she and her husband paid off all of their debts. Other people were congratulating her, cheering for her, and asking her how she did it. The girl said that they achieved it because COVID-19 forced her and her husband to stay inside and stop going out to spend money. Also, the unemployment checks and government stimulus program gave them enough extra income to pay all of their debts. Then, in the following sentence, the girl said, “My husband and I can’t decide if we want to buy a 2nd house or buy a 2nd car.”
Can you see the fake advice cleverly hidden in this story? First, paying off bad debt is an excellent thing. However, the root of bad debt is bad choices.
Debt can also be positive if it puts money back in our pocket, such as borrowing money to purchase an investment. How many times would you take a loan out for $1000 if it paid you $5000?
A big red flag is that she said COVID-19 forced them to stay inside and not spend money. What that means is that they couldn’t find anyone to take their money (or debt). So, these two people were more than willing to go out, spend money they didn’t have, and get into more debt, but circumstances prevented it. This behavior suggests that these two people don’t have the discipline to remain free of bad debt, and consume less, which means they can’t teach others how to get out of debt.
Next, this couple got out of debt using temporary relief funds. It’s not a sustainable plan to rely on the government to bail us out because they’re in massive debt themselves. The stimulus funds and additional unemployment income paid by the Federal government was approved because the government knows that spending stimulates the economy (the government wants people to get in debt).
Finally, the couple can’t decide if they want to buy a 2nd house or a 2nd car now that they’re debt-free. For anyone who has recently broken the grip of bad debt, they know that they’re basically at $0. How could someone have the income to buy a home or a car immediately? They can’t, without more debt. The couple is looking for the next place they can give their money to, the next spot they can get into debt because they haven’t truly learned how to operate without it. And if they don’t live it, they can’t teach other people how to do it.
If this couple gave other people advice on how to get out of debt, those people might follow it and waste years of precious time that could have gone towards their real purpose. This obstacle was longer than the others, but I need to emphasize the importance of the fake teachers in this world, so you don’t end up wandering in the jungle. One more time, if they don’t live it, they can’t teach you how to do it.
(4) Living In The Past
The fourth obstacle is living in the past. “I had Amazon stock in 1997 if I hadn’t sold it, I would be rich right now!” Have you heard people talk like that? And have you heard of a man named Ron Wayne? Most haven’t, however, he was the (little known) 3rd owner of Apple with Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak. In 1976, Wayne was frightened of the enormous debt that Steve Jobs was amassing to build Apple.
Besides the debt, Jobs and Wayne didn’t see eye to eye on Apple, ultimately resulting in Wayne selling his 10% ownership in Apple for $800. Today, a 10% ownership in Apple would be worth about $100 billion. Still, Wayne has repeated time and again that he doesn’t live with regret and wouldn’t change his decision if he could.
Wayne went on to say, “If I had stayed with Apple and accepted the limitations on my philosophy of life, I could have well ended up the richest man in the cemetery. I was in my 40s; these kids were whirlwinds. It was like having a tiger by the tail.”
Change is inevitable, and we must be able to release ourselves from any ties to people, jobs, and companies. The past exists as a teacher, it won’t change, but we can use it to improve our present and our future. What life changes are occurring for you right now? By being present, you won’t miss critical opportunities. Be fluid, like a river, ready to change, staying unattached to everything that doesn’t serve you.
If you feel forced to make a decision, as Wayne did, don’t live with regret once you make a choice. Wayne went on to live a beautiful life in Nevada, free from remorse for his decision with Apple. Although some people have written about him, calling him the most unlucky man on Earth, if they were in his shoes at the time, many of those people would have made the same decision.
Your life’s purpose evolves as you evolve; it isn’t rigid. Once we freeze ourselves in our habits, time passes, and we lose the sense of purpose that sparked so much wonder for us as children. Let the past serve its only purpose, to be your teacher.
(5) Getting Sidetracked
The fifth and final obstacle is getting sidetracked. Before politics, Abraham Lincoln was a lawyer. He taught himself law by reading William Blackstone’s Commentaries on the Laws of England. Lincoln was accepted to the bar in 1837 and made a move to Springfield, Illinois, where he practiced law in the John T. Stuart law firm.
In 1844, Lincoln formed a partnership with a man named William Herndon to practice law together. Admittedly, Lincoln and Herndon’s styles of law varied; however, they created a close relationship (professionally as well as personally).
Lincoln was doing well as a lawyer, but it wasn’t his real purpose. There also wasn’t enough work in Springfield, Illinois, so Lincoln needed more income. To supplement himself, he followed the court through various seats in the county of Illinois. Nonetheless, Lincoln wasn’t born to be a lawyer.
From 1847 to 1849, Abraham Lincoln served in the U.S. House of Representatives. This brief move into national politics was nothing astounding, and very short. As part of the Whig party, he was the only representative from Illinois. Lincoln showed loyalty to the Whig but had almost no allies.
In Lincoln’s term, he opposed the Mexican-American War, opting to support Zachary Taylor for president. By speaking out against the war, Lincoln’s home state didn’t like him. He didn’t run for a second term and went backward, returning to Springfield to resume his law career. As you can see here, Lincoln was flirting with his purpose but fell off his path.
In the 1850s, the railroad industry was expanding west, and Illinois became an essential stop for many companies; Lincoln lobbied for the Illinois Central Railroad as its attorney. Other clients began desiring to work with Lincoln due to his success in several cases. Among the clients were banking, insurance, and manufacturing companies. Aside from business cases, Lincoln also worked in criminal trials. With this success, Lincoln could have easily continued down his path as an attorney, but he would have missed his life’s calling.
In 1854, the Kansas-Nebraska Act came into law; this act repealed the Missouri Compromise, allowing individual states and territories to choose their position on slavery. The bill also created strong opponents in Kansas and Illinois, which gave power to the Republican Party.
This act was the catalyst that pushed Lincoln back into politics, swaying his views on slavery towards anger, provoked by unfair treatment. Shortly after, Lincoln joined the Republican Party in 1856.
Back in the political arena, Lincoln challenged U.S. Senator Stephen Douglas for his seat. Lincoln criticized Douglas, the Supreme Court, and President Buchanan for supporting slavery, and he declared, “a house divided cannot stand.”
Understand that although the state legislature elected Douglas, the attention Lincoln received thrust him into national politics.
Because of Lincoln’s political clout, Illinois organized a campaign in support of Lincoln for the 1860 presidential election. Chicago’s Republican National Convention on May 18th was a pivotal day. Lincoln made himself a name when he defeated known candidates, New York’s William Seward, and Ohio’s Salmon P. Chase.
Lincoln was nominated because his views on slavery were moderate; he supported improvements to the nation’s infrastructure, and he was in favor of protective tariffs.
The general election was challenging, but Lincoln defeated Stephen Douglas, John C. Breckinridge of the Northern Democrats, and the Constitution Party’s John Bell. Earning nearly 40 percent of the popular vote and 180 of 303 Electoral College votes, Lincoln won the presidential election.
Can you imagine if President Lincoln never went back into politics? The world would have been worse for it. Lincoln is considered by many to be the greatest United States president ever to live. He was known for using every presidential power he possessed to enact change. Most notably, Lincoln won the civil war and changed U.S. history by freeing the slaves with the emancipation proclamation.
None of this would have happened if he ignored his real purpose and remained a successful attorney in Illinois. Your obstacle is getting on the wrong path, but similar to Lincoln, you need to treat it as a life or death commitment to leave your current way and pursue your true calling.
Follow me on Twitter here: Twitter.com/Wes_Lee_Success
Browse my latest books here: http://amazon.com/author/wes_lee
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